No great seducer can claim to be so without adding an element of failure and frustration to the equation, and no one can be good at anything for long if they don’t constantly search for ways in which to better themselves and their way of responding to things. In synthesis, great lovers are seldom born and more often than not suffered and created through years and years of humiliation and pain. So, I say it once more: we are all amateurs when it comes to loving.
It has taken me long to realize that the better I was at something, like writing, for instance, the more I found there always was something I could improve or learn. If we could take a look at our brains, we’d see that new connections are being made from one neuron to the next, we are growing as we learn to adapt.
What does this have to do with keeping your mouth shut? Well, for one, I never use the little things I know to impress girls. I never talk incessantly when I’m around them. In fact, I keep quiet. It creates tension and quite honestly talking is a way of manifesting your anxiety. When you talk, you break the spell of her imagination and give her in the process too many clues to figure you out. Besides, men are not talkers. Let them do the talking and the feeling, and feel free to move on to some another topic.
Some guys think that they are impressing a girl by building up the courage to talk to her. Girls are being approached all the time and in the process lost their sensibility to words. It is not what you say; it is how you say it. It is how long can you keep quiet and ignite the fire with facial gestures that exult confidence and comfortableness to you in general that will put her at ease. Mountains never feel the need to talk. Yet how powerful and majestic they appear before us.
But some guys, again, as soon as they hear this, they go and talk to their friends about it. That is not the self-restraint that we are after. In fact, a great seducer is so not so much in the way he deals with girls as he often appears to not have any particular interest in them but in the way that he deals with the rest of the world. Girls see you interacting with others way before they come to interact with you. They need the reserved type, the guy who is not going to run his mouth in public about his private affairs. And if you are the type who can’t just shut up for a minute and be around people quite, they are going to be going the other way when you come into sight. This shutting up business is not easy at all. That is also part of its seductive nature. The more you can keep to yourself and the less you seem to need of the world that surrounds you, the more you intrigue those around you and the more they want to pick at your brain and get to know what you are all about. So, shut up! Don’t go telling guys what you know before you actually put it to the test. Besides, isn’t it nice after all that this is perhaps the thing easiest to do when we don’t know how to act or what to say in a particular situation? You say more sometimes by keeping quite and giving certain look and air that you know what’s up but you are just above it all. So, again, shut up.
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