The obstacles: Desperation

What we suffer is an addiction to women. It is not a harmless addiction and like all vices it can only add to our misery. Culturally, we grow up surrounded by them but somewhere along the road we drift apart and boys are known to have no respect for their young rivals anymore than they have it for other boys. Since little, all that matters is to be ripe for the competition. Then somewhere in our teenage years, hormones kick in and we are drawn to one another in a way that takes us by surprise. The desire that we feel for them is very unrealistic. Emotions tend to be exaggerated because otherwise our drive to reproduce could be in jeopardy. We should understand our emotions if we want to be successful with the opposite sex. Take hunger, for instance. When we are hungry, we don’t simply say things like “Gee, I guess I’ll have a snack and a plate of fruits”, no, no. We say things like “I’m starving!” or “I got to eat now!” Of course, it’s not starvation what we’re faced with. It’s a far cry from it. But our emotions, if they are to be met, have to demand more of ourselves.
Of all the women we see on a daily basis, we get to meet one or two at most, and that is if we are any good at. Of the ones we get to talk to and meet again, one out of five, maybe, will make time to meet us again. So why is it that we treat member of the opposite sex that we find attractive as a potential mate, and never stop to question our motives in the eyes of our desire. It seems like we are in too deep way too soon; in fact, our overwhelming interest has nothing to do with the subject at sight. It is more a reflection of our frustrated self, a lack of some sort, an instinct, an irrational drive to mate. In a way, it is a natural response. Otherwise, we would never get a chance at procreating.
So what is the alternative? Desperation is a bad sign but it is as natural as defecating in our pants. The thing is to rehabituate ourselves, it takes time, discipline and some effort. Life is complex. So don't assume that you should overcome your desire immediately, and instead try to rationalize your response and attempt a calmer response. Imagine the powerful metaphor of water. You have to be neutral, like cool water. If someone jumps in you, you can't be too hot or too cold. Chances are that by nature you are steaming, so focus on making a cooler spectrum overall.